Lulu, the singer who rose to fame in 1964 with the hit "Shout," says she was "afraid of sex" as a teenager and has also revealed she is in recovery from alcoholism in an exclusive extract from her forthcoming memoir, If Only You Knew.
In the extract, published ahead of the book's Sept. 25 release, Lulu, 76, describes feeling "very self-conscious" about sex after becoming a star at 15 and growing up in a household where the subject was not discussed. She wrote that she preferred to wait to fall in love and that the idea of sex pushed her into fantasy rather than physical intimacy. "I wanted love, I wanted romance. I was just scared of the reality, so I spent my time wrapped up in fantasy, in love with the idea of love," she wrote.
Lulu said she did not have a clear understanding of human biology because she had skipped much school and that sex had not been openly discussed in her family. She recounted having boyfriends, including Alex Bell of the Luvvers and a brief romance with Peter Noone of Herman's Hermits, but said relationships rarely progressed beyond goodnight kisses. She added that she had "never had any bad experiences" in the bedroom and credited her first manager, Marian, and friendships with musicians' wives and girlfriends for helping to protect her.
The memoir extract also includes a personal anecdote about a crush on Eric Clapton. Lulu wrote that she threw a party hoping Clapton would attend, and described nervously watching him and later trying to "act cool" while talking with him outside late that night.
Separately, in an interview with The Times that accompanied the book's promotion, Lulu disclosed that she had been a "secret drinker" and has spent time in rehab. She said her drinking worsened in her sixties after she became menopausal, her parents died and her son, Jordan Frieda, left home. "For me, it had been controllable until I got into my sixties," she said. "After I became menopausal, with both my parents gone, the empty nest, looking around and seeing all the young kids in the music industry, I became more and more reliant on it and so it just got worse."
Lulu attributed some of her struggles to a difficult childhood. She described witnessing violent domestic scenes between her parents and recalled an incident in which her father was "dragged away" by police. She said she understood alcoholism as "a family illness" and that she had long carried "shame" about aspects of her upbringing. "The gene is there," she wrote.
The singer, who has been married twice—first to Maurice Gibb from 1969 to 1973 and later to John Frieda from 1977 to 1991—said she had for years chosen not to speak publicly about her alcoholism until she felt she had the language to do so and had learnt from other memoirs and self-help books. She said she hoped sharing her experience might help others.
Lulu said she now lives in central London with her cockapoo and that life feels "brighter." If Only You Knew is published by Hodder & Stoughton and is due Sept. 25. Lulu is scheduled to begin a tour at the end of September; tickets are being promoted through her official website.
The memoir extract and the interview follow a decades-long career that began when Lulu was a teenager and have come as the singer candidly addresses both personal and professional episodes in her life. The forthcoming book and the tour mark the latest chapter in public reflections on fame, family and recovery.