Vicky Pattison, 38, has spoken candidly about her fertility journey, revealing tearfully that she feels "lost" because she does not yet have a baby. The former "Geordie Shore" star, who began the process of freezing her eggs at age 35, shared her feelings on the BBC's "Sort Your Life Out Unpacked" podcast.
Pattison explained that she wanted to take control of her fertility and has since frozen three embryos. She and her husband, Ercan, are now trying for children. "I didn't think I'd be this age without a baby or a family," she admitted.
She described a shift in her perspective, stating, "It's just the way the cookie crumbles and like how life sometimes like presents you with different things and different opportunities and stuff. And I've never really felt ready until now." She added that once the feeling of readiness strikes, "it's like you need a baby straight away." Pattison reflected on her past contentment, saying, "And all my whole life I felt so content and so happy and so proud of the things I was doing, and now all of a sudden, because I don't have a baby, I feel a bit lost."
Pattison expressed her love for her husband, Ercan, and her belief that he will be a great father. The couple is attempting to avoid putting excessive pressure on themselves. "We made a decision a couple years ago to freeze our eggs which I'm like so happy we did. Gives you that bit of a security blanket," she said.
She hopes that egg-freezing treatments will become more accessible and affordable for more women. "I look forward to the day where that is a treatment that is available for more women, more affordable, certainly," she stated. Pattison also acknowledged that these processes take time, noting that patience is not one of her strong suits.
In a previous interview with Women's Health UK, Pattison had spoken about a "huge question mark over motherhood" and described the pressure to have a baby after getting married as "suffocating." She voiced concerns about taking a break from her career, which she has worked hard to build. "I've worked to finally get to a place where I'm proud of who I'm becoming, and the thought of taking a break… it scares me."
Pattison emphasized her role as an advocate for egg freezing but acknowledged doing so from a position of financial privilege. She argued against the notion that women are beholden to an "invisible timeline" and critiqued the narrative that women can "have it all." According to Pattison, women's lives often involve compromise. She met her husband, Ercan, when she was 31, and their decision to give their relationship breathing room before starting a family has been beneficial. "I felt really suffocated, on a kind of conveyor belt, and now I feel free," she said.
Pattison and Ercan are in agreement about wanting more time to make decisions regarding parenthood. Discussing the matter on the Women's Health "Just as Well" podcast with Gemma Atkinson and Claire Sanderson, Pattison shared her mother's empowering perspective: "If not having children is your trajectory, that's fine."
She believes society is gradually accepting that a woman does not need to have children to find fulfillment. For herself, she stated, "there's still a huge question mark over motherhood."