Nine years after her divorce from Andrew Bermejo, actress Sally Phillips has opened up about her deep-seated fears of ending her marriage and navigating life as a single mother to their three sons. Phillips, known for her roles in the Bridget Jones films and the sketch show Smack the Pony, admitted that her fear of "being on my own with three children" significantly impacted her ability to address marital issues.
Phillips, 56, and Bermejo divorced in 2017 after 14 years of marriage. They now co-parent their sons: Luke, 17, Tom, 14, and Olly, who is in his early 20s and has Down syndrome. In reflection, Phillips stated that she refused to acknowledge the possibility of divorce toward the end of the relationship, believing that discussing potential problems would have allowed for constructive conversation.
"I wouldn't talk about the possibility of it ending, so we could never actually talk about what was wrong," Phillips told The Mirror. "I'd only talk about positive things we could do, like courses we could go on."
She realized the marriage was unsustainable when "I made him feel awful just by being me, and he made me feel awful just by being him. To continue in that was not successful."
The primary driver of her fear, Phillips explained, was the prospect of raising her children alone. "I was so frightened of the marriage ending and me being on my own with one, two, three children," she said. "And I was so sure that I couldn't manage that."
However, she has since found that she could manage, leading her to conclude that "divorce isn't always failure." Phillips now views "life force as really precious."
Since her divorce, Phillips has found a new relationship with former Army Captain Ian Pilcher. The couple, who met on a blind date in 2019, now live together in West London and jointly own a catering business. Phillips has described Pilcher, who served with the King's Regiment for nine years, as "to die for" and humorously recounted a moment of realization during their first kiss, thinking, "you need to be kissed a lot by someone who knows how."
Phillips's acting career continues with her role as Lily Petal in the BBC One crime drama The Hairdresser Mysteries, where she plays a salon owner turned amateur sleuth in a small town.