Alexandra “Tiggy” Legge‑Bourke, who acted as a nanny and family companion to Princes William and Harry, took on an intensified protective and maternal role in the immediate aftermath of Princess Diana’s death in August 1997, helping the teenage princes cope with public and private grief.
Legge‑Bourke, appointed by then‑Prince Charles as an assistant and nanny in 1993, accompanied the boys on family outings and holidays and was often described by the young royals as a “big sister.” Royal biographer Tina Brown writes in Palace Papers that on the Monday after Diana’s funeral Tiggy took the princes to follow the Beaufort Hunt on foot in an effort to distract them and restore a sense of routine. Brown quotes the hunt’s joint master greeting the princes with measured sympathy and urging the day to go on, an exchange she says reflected the stoic public composure expected of the family.
Legge‑Bourke’s relationship with the royal household predated her 1993 appointment. Her father served in the Royal Horse Guards, her mother became a lady‑in‑waiting to Princess Anne in 1987, and her brother had been a Page of Honour to Queen Elizabeth II. Those connections, and her work close to Charles after his separation from Diana, meant she was already a familiar figure within the family when public attention intensified after Diana’s death.
Members of the royal household and later memoirs and biographies record that the princes responded to Tiggy’s presence in different ways. Brown notes William’s composed response to the Beaufort Hunt master’s condolence, while Harry is described as having struggled more with the loss. In his 2020 memoir Spare, Harry called Legge‑Bourke “our favourite nanny,” though he recorded that she resisted the label and preferred to position herself as a friend. He also described her as someone willing to admonish him when necessary, including over public disclosures.
Tensions between Legge‑Bourke and Diana were reported during the marriage breakdown of Diana and Charles. According to published extracts and family correspondences, Diana voiced suspicion over the time Legge‑Bourke spent with her sons and objected to certain habits. In February 1996 Diana wrote to Charles, requesting that Tiggy “not spend unnecessary time in the children's rooms, read to them at night, nor supervise their bathtime.” Reporters and later books have recounted other incidents that fuelled friction, including comments attributed to Tiggy about parenting choices and the different kinds of activities she provided the boys.
The former nanny’s name also became entangled in the broader controversy surrounding the 1995 BBC interview that Diana gave to Martin Bashir. Investigations later found that false documents and forged bank statements had been used to secure the interview, including material that purported to show an intimate relationship involving Legge‑Bourke. The BBC has since apologised and agreed to pay substantial damages to Legge‑Bourke over those fabricated allegations.
Legge‑Bourke retired from her royal household role after marrying her childhood sweetheart and security consultant Charles Pettifer in 1999, but she has remained close to both princes in the decades since. She attended a number of family milestones, including Prince Harry’s commissioning at Sandhurst in 2006 and his wedding to Meghan Markle in 2018. She is also a godmother to Archie Mountbatten‑Windsor, the eldest child of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex.
Royal commentators and those close to the family say Legge‑Bourke’s long ties with the household and her willingness to provide stability and normalizing activities — from hunting and fishing to family holidays — helped shape the princes’ upbringing after their mother’s death. Her role has been framed by friends and in memoirs as both disciplinary and affectionate: a mixture of sisterly companionship, practical stewardship and a buffer between the boys and the glare of public life.
As the royal family has navigated high‑profile departures, media scrutiny and internal tensions over the past three decades, Legge‑Bourke’s presence has been cited by friends and biographers as an example of the informal support network that sustained the princes. The published record places her among the few lifelong confidantes who remained in contact as William and Harry transitioned into public adult roles, even where aspects of the past — including the BBC’s admission regarding forged material — have required official redress.
Legge‑Bourke’s story is woven into the larger account of the family’s efforts to manage personal grief within the expectations of duty and public visibility. Her activities in the weeks after Diana’s death, and her continuing association with the princes, underline how close domestic aides and family friends can influence the private lives of public figures and become part of the historical record of a family under intense media scrutiny.