Paul Burrell, the former butler to Diana, Princess of Wales, recounts a series of behind‑the‑palace scenes in his forthcoming memoir that portray a marriage in chronic crisis, a prince demanding loyalty and a princess seeking solace outside the royal household.
In an extract adapted from The Royal Insider, to be published Sept. 11 by Sphere, Burrell writes that he was once summoned by the then Prince of Wales and ordered to lie about Charles’s whereabouts after Diana rang. When Burrell refused, he says, Charles became enraged, banged his fists on a desk, screamed "Get out! Get out!" and threw a book at him. Burrell frames the incident as emblematic of widening tensions in the household as Diana and Charles grew apart.
Burrell, who left the Queen’s service in 1987 to become a personal assistant to the Prince and Princess of Wales, writes that Diana never wanted a divorce and that she deeply loved Charles despite his reported indifference. He attributes to Diana frequent statements that Charles "never loved you. I only married you to have children," and recalls her telling him she felt Charles had favored Camilla Parker Bowles from the beginning. Burrell says many staff were unaware of how bad relations between the couple were when he joined their service.
The memoir traces a timeline of domestic and public ruptures. William was born in 1982 and Harry in 1984, and Burrell says those early years marked turning points in Diana’s isolation: she found herself relegated to the role of mother while Charles, he writes, resumed his relationship with Camilla. He describes intimate household details — Charles’s ritual of insisting a boiled egg be cooked for exactly four minutes, and the frequent memoranda in the prince’s handwriting — to illustrate the demands of serving the couple.
Burrell also recounts episodes of intense personal conflict. He says he witnessed arguments that escalated beyond shouting, with smashed plates, overturned tables and one occasion in which he found the prince "crumpled on the floor in his silk dressing gown, covered in salad dressing and surrounded by broken china and glass." Burrell attributes the origins of many of those confrontations to the couple’s deteriorating relationship.
The memoir also chronicles Diana’s relationships outside the marriage. Burrell says she confided in him that she had taken a lover, identifying James Hewitt as someone who became "her every waking thought" while he was deployed in Iraq, and that hundreds of parcels and letters were sent to him. He describes arranging clandestine logistics and later recounts Diana’s secret affair with Hasnat Khan, a heart surgeon she reportedly considered marrying.
Burrell writes that he acted as a go‑between for Diana and Hasnat, smuggling Khan into Kensington Palace under a blanket and organising candlelit dinners. He says the relationship endured for about two years before ending when Khan concluded marriage would compromise his career and identity. Burrell suggests Diana’s failed attempt to secure a civil or religious ceremony with Khan contributed to her subsequent acceptance of other invitations, including time with Dodi Fayed in 1997.
The book considers the wider public moments that exposed the marriage. Burrell recounts Diana’s fury after a 1994 television documentary in which Charles is reported to have admitted adultery with Camilla, and Diana’s decision to attend a Vanity Fair dinner that evening wearing the black gown that later became known as her "revenge dress." He also describes Diana’s participation in the 1995 Panorama interview with Martin Bashir — a broadcast that drew nearly 23 million viewers and in which she famously said "There were three of us in this marriage" — and writes that Diana regretted later having been persuaded to speak so candidly about James Hewitt.
Burrell writes that the royal household and members of the royal family responded in a range of ways. He says the Queen and Prince Philip privately expressed sympathy for Diana and did not approve of extra‑marital affairs by either party; he describes a letter from the Queen indicating that senior figures, including the prime minister and the archbishop of Canterbury, had discussed and concluded a divorce was in the national interest. Burrell says palace staff were told about the separation the day before it was publicly announced.
He recounts a meeting in 2017 in Kensington Palace with Princes William and Harry, during which he says he repeated Diana’s earlier declaration that Charles had married to have children rather than out of love. Burrell writes that the princes pressed him for the point at which he believed their parents’ marriage had failed, and describes Harry as "poker‑faced" and silent when told the account.
Burrell addresses contemporary debates about Diana’s legacy. He says he understands William’s wish to prevent the repeated airing of the Panorama interview but that he worries the interview’s suppression would silence Diana’s own words for a new generation. He also cites Prince Harry’s 2022 remark in the Netflix series Harry & Meghan — that Diana "was deceived into giving the [Panorama] interview but at the same time, she spoke the truth of her experience" — and says he agrees with that assessment.
The memoir presents a chronicle of private grief and public spectacle, told from the vantage of a household insider. It interweaves personal recollections with moments in the public record: childbirths in 1982 and 1984, the couple’s separation and the 1992 publication of Andrew Morton’s Diana: Her True Story, the broadcast of the Dimbleby documentary in 1994, the Panorama interview in 1995 and Diana’s death in 1997. Burrell frames his account as both a personal testimony to Diana’s vulnerabilities and an attempt to preserve her voice.
The Royal Insider will be published Sept. 11. The extract is adapted from the book and represents Burrell’s recollections and perspective on events involving Diana, the Prince of Wales and other figures in and around the household.