The concept of a "holiday divorce," where couples opt for separate vacations, is gaining traction as a way to ensure both partners enjoy their time off and return to the relationship refreshed. This approach allows individuals to pursue distinct vacation styles without the need for compromise, potentially reducing friction and enhancing marital satisfaction.
Married couple Lev Baker, 27, from the USA, and Mia Kim, 30, from New Zealand, are proponents of this travel strategy. Having met while solo traveling and now married for four years, they have visited over 30 countries together. However, they acknowledge that their interests sometimes diverge significantly.
Baker describes himself as an "outdoors person" who enjoys what he calls "type 2 fun" – activities like multi-day hiking trips and backpacking that are challenging in the moment but rewarding in retrospect. Kim, on the other hand, prefers activities such as shopping, visiting "Instagrammable things," exploring cafes, and photography.
This difference in preferences became particularly evident when planning a trip to Scotland. Baker had planned a seven-day hiking and camping trip along the West Highland Way with a friend, an experience Kim felt would not align with her idea of a good time due to the rugged nature and potential discomfort. Instead of forcing a compromise or opting out, Kim booked a separate 10-day solo trip to Porto, Portugal.
While Baker navigated the elements and the demands of his hiking adventure, Kim immersed herself in the culture of Porto, enjoying photography, local cafes, music, and port wine. Baker's meals consisted of basic provisions like canned tuna and sandwiches, a stark contrast to Kim's culinary exploration.
Statistics suggest this trend is not isolated. Research by travel company Road Scholar indicated that 60 percent of solo travelers in 2022 were married individuals traveling without their partners. Further statistics from Condor Ferries suggest that 65 percent of women from the U.S. took a holiday without their partner in the 2024-2025 period.
Baker and Kim emphasize that their "holiday divorces" are built on a foundation of trust and communication. While apart, they maintain contact, speaking on the phone daily. Upon reuniting, they share their experiences through photos and stories, which they find enriches their shared experiences.
This approach extends beyond extended vacations. Even for day-to-day activities, the couple is comfortable separating if their interests diverge, such as one partner wanting to explore a market while the other goes for a run. They acknowledge that some social media commenters express insecurity about partners traveling separately, but Baker and Kim maintain that their independent trips allow them to fully engage in their personal interests without diminishing their connection.
The "holiday divorce" is not intended as a permanent separation but rather a temporary measure to ensure individual fulfillment during travel, ultimately contributing to a more harmonious and enjoyable partnership when they are together.