Amanda Platell, writing in the Daily Mail, recounted five failed marriage proposals she received over several decades and used the stories to advise would-be proposers on what, in her view, makes an engagement memorable and meaningful. Platell contrasted her experiences with the recently announced engagement of Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce, saying the celebrity proposal — reported to include an expensive diamond ring and a floral setting — illustrated the elements she believes matter: thoughtfulness, timing and an appropriate ring.
Platell wrote that a successful proposal "isn't rocket science," but that it requires effort and an understanding of the partner's expectations. She argued that younger men may be more attuned to such details and praised Kelce for having focused on his partner rather than copying others. "Man, you've gotta know your gal," Platell quoted Kelce as saying on his podcast, adding that proposals should be done "for the right reasons."
Platell then detailed five episodes she described as calamitous attempts to pop the question. The first account dated to the 1980s in Sydney, when a then-boyfriend and later husband asked Platell to marry him in a small, insect-infested flat while she was preparing a meal. She recalled the proposal as casual, without declarations of love or a ring. The pair drove to a flea market for a ring; she chose a battered 1940s eternity ring that later lost a tiny ruby. The marriage lasted six years.
Her second account involved a man she described as a successful London lawyer in their 40s. Platell said he proposed in a kitchen, producing a pink velvet box that contained a high-street bangle rather than a ring. She wrote that the bangle left green marks on her wrist and that the man returned it to the shop and proudly presented her with a refund receipt. In her column she noted he had balked at traditional expectations for ring spending and later suggested using the resale value of a ring she already owned as a substitute.
The third proposal recounted took place while Platell was backpacking from Australia to the United Kingdom with a lover in her early 20s. On a misty hilltop near Blarney Castle in Cork, Ireland, the man knelt and offered a gold-painted, plastic claddagh ring bought from a souvenir shop. She described the moment as moving, but said the relationship ended a month later when the man left at the airport to remain in England and pursue a writing career that, she wrote, never materialized.
The fourth episode came after Platell had become deputy editor of a British national newspaper. She said a boyfriend who had previously vowed never to marry arrived at her office and proposed across a barbed-wire security fence. The velvet box he produced contained not a ring but a Rolex Oyster watch. Platell wrote that, while she accepted the engagement and wore the watch, the absence of a ring and apparent reluctance to plan a wedding contributed to the relationship's end; she later offered to return the watch, but the man insisted she keep it.
The fifth proposal, Platell wrote, was the most secretive and raised the most red flags. She described being taken to a Lebanese restaurant by a doctor with whom she lived but who had not told friends and family about the relationship. They visited Tiffany's together, selected a slim gold band set with tiny diamonds, and Platell said the bill was pushed across the counter to her. She said the man disappeared in the store shortly after and later learned he was still married. She returned the ring and said she made him reimburse her for the purchase.
Platell used the episodes to offer practical advice for proposals, emphasizing romance, attentiveness and the symbolic importance of an engagement ring. She referenced the long-standing Western tradition of placing a band on the left ring finger, noting its historical association with a so-called "vena amoris," or vein of love. In the column she counseled would-be proposers to avoid cheap or thoughtless gestures, self-authored poems that may elicit laughter rather than tears, and spectacle that does not reflect the partner's preferences.
Reporting on public reaction to high-profile engagements, Platell cited Kelce's remarks about tailoring a proposal to a partner rather than copying others. The columnist said that, in her experience, proposals that reflect personal knowledge of the partner's desires are likelier to succeed.
The column frames the five episodes as cautionary tales and closes with Platell's assertion that the single most important element of a proposal is the act of placing a ring on the partner's finger while asking them to marry — an act she described as "the most exquisite moment of joy for both of you." The piece connects her personal history to broader social expectations around engagement rituals and the degree to which those expectations have been shaped by both tradition and contemporary celebrity examples.