Brisbane author Jane Musgrave lost $40,000 to an online lover after maxing out credit cards, taking cash advances, and borrowing from loan sharks to support him. The months-long deception was exposed when the man, who she believed was overseas for work, sent her a message intended for another victim.
Musgrave, who was newly sober when she began online dating, was contacted by a man she described as "gorgeous" and "charming." He told her everything she wanted to hear and eventually professed his love. The requests for money began with claims of a sick mother needing medication and escalated to work-related problems.
"My friends warned me. Deep down, I knew something wasn't right," Musgrave stated. "But by then, I was maxing out my credit card, taking cash advances and borrowing from loan sharks."
The scam unraveled when Musgrave received an email from the man stating he would not call that night because she was sick and advising her to have chicken soup. "What the f**k? I'm not sick. That's when it hit me. He'd sent the email to the wrong woman," she recalled.
Despite the financial ruin and heartbreak, Musgrave remained sober and rebuilt her life. She documented her resilience in her memoir, "My Journey Out of the Bottle: Four Rehabs and a Recovery."
Romance scams remain a significant issue in Australia. Last year, Scamwatch reported nearly $140 million in losses from 1,330 Australians, a 22% increase from the previous year. Over 80% of these losses originated from online contact, including social media and dating apps. Individuals over 65 accounted for more than a quarter of total reported losses.
The National Anti-Scam Centre outlines common tactics used by romance scammers, including love bombing to build trust, encouraging private communication away from dating platforms, and a consistent inability or unwillingness to meet in person. Scammers often claim to be working overseas or in the military. Initial requests for money for emergencies typically escalate over time, involving medical treatments, travel expenses, business issues, investments, or cryptocurrency transactions.