Emilia Pustkowska, the mother of Kamil Pustkowski, a 17-year-old who died in a head-on collision on the M9 motorway, has described her extensive but ultimately unsuccessful efforts to obtain assistance from the State child and family agency, Tusla.
Ms. Pustkowska told the Irish Mail on Sunday that she engaged with Tusla for over a year, beginning in March 2025 after her son became intoxicated in class and was reported by the school and gardaí. She found the agency's responses unhelpful, with their primary advice being to "keep him at home so he will be safe." This advice was problematic for Ms. Pustkowska, who stated, "I'm not able to keep him home safe, because he is twice [as big as] me." She questioned the agency's directives, asking, "What do you want me to do – tie him up, use force?" Tusla reportedly responded that such actions would constitute child abuse.
Kamil, who had been diagnosed with autism, had experienced bullying and assaults that required hospitalization. Ms. Pustkowska had also appealed to a judge for her son to be placed in custody after he pleaded guilty to offenses weeks before the fatal crash. However, that court case was adjourned due to a solicitors' strike.
Despite her appeals, Tusla was unable to compel Kamil to attend meetings. Ms. Pustkowska met with agency staff alone and requested they visit her home to assess Kamil, but this never occurred. All subsequent communication was via telephone, including a call the Thursday before the crash. During this final call, Ms. Pustkowska expressed her fears and reiterated her request for her son to be detained, but she encountered what she described as a "brick wall."
Tusla staff reportedly informed her, "We can't do anything... He's still a minor, he's still a child. He's supposed to be under your supervision, and he will grow up." Ms. Pustkowska highlighted the dilemma, explaining that if she resorted to actions that would lead to her prosecution, such as assault or engaging in criminal behavior, the authorities might intervene to remove her son. She felt abandoned by the state, emphasizing the lack of support for parents once a child turns 16, when parental consent is often required for psychological help or school attendance. "You are actually stuck in the middle of nowhere," she stated.
Ms. Pustkowska acknowledged that residential care, a potential Tusla solution, is not always effective, noting that one of the five youths involved in the M9 crash had been in Tusla care. She believes the juvenile justice and child protection systems are fundamentally flawed.
She also addressed public criticism following the crash, noting that an interview published last weekend in the Mail on Sunday shifted the narrative from blaming parents to initiating a broader discussion. She has since connected with other mothers facing similar challenges. Ms. Pustkowska extended her apologies to the four individuals injured in the crash, expressing hope for their full recovery. Tusla was contacted for comment.