Chilling messages sent by Lindsay Clancy to a nurse practitioner in the weeks before she killed her three young children and attempted suicide were revealed this week during her murder trial. Clancy, 32 at the time, communicated with nurse practitioner Rebecca Jollotta via MyChart in early December 2022, detailing overwhelming intrusive thoughts, concerns about medication dependence, and a pervasive sense of numbness.
"I feel like I'm going to die and I don't care," Clancy messaged Jollotta on December 2, 2022. She described experiencing feelings she had never encountered before. Jollotta, who works at South Shore Hospital’s Perinatal Behavioral Clinic, responded by explaining that intrusive thoughts are common in cases of postpartum depression and do not reflect on a person's capabilities as a mother.
On January 24, 2023, less than two months after these messages, Clancy murdered her children Cora, 5, Dawson, 3, and 8-month-old Callan, using exercise bands before attempting suicide by slitting her wrists and throat and jumping from the second story of her Duxbury, Massachusetts home. She survived but was left partially paralyzed.
Jollotta treated Clancy from November 29 to December 13, 2022, prescribing several psychiatric medications. A day after beginning treatment with Jollotta, on November 30, Clancy conveyed her distress, stating, "What I'm really feeling is I cannot go on this way." Later that day, Clancy requested a phone call with Jollotta, but the nurse practitioner, citing a busy schedule, had a junior staff member call instead.
Over the following days, Clancy, a former labor and delivery nurse, elaborated on her intrusive thoughts and anxieties regarding her treatment and medications. "It's just a very scary stressful time for me, and starting new meds with side effects is very scary to me," she wrote. On December 2, she reported taking Remeron, an antidepressant, and waking with intrusive thoughts of wanting it all to end. Clancy also pressed Jollotta about a potential addiction to the anxiety medication Ativan, expressing a feeling of not being heard on this matter. "I feel addicted to it, and I feel like I'm not being heard that that is a possibility," she wrote. She added, "I feel completely numb. I feel like I'm going to die, and I don't care. What do I do about this?"
Jollotta testified that she did not believe Clancy was addicted to the medications, interpreting her messages as indicators of suicidal ideation. On December 15, 2022, Clancy and her then-husband, Patrick Clancy, contacted Jollotta to report persistent suicidal thoughts. Jollotta's notes from the call indicated Clancy had "no active plan" to harm herself.
Clancy did seek treatment at an emergency room that day and opted for an outpatient program at Women and Infants Hospital in Rhode Island instead of admitting herself to McLean Hospital, a mental institution. Jollotta had strongly recommended inpatient treatment at Women and Infants in a December 12 message. However, when Clancy presented at the Rhode Island facility on December 20, she was reportedly turned away due to concerns about overmedication, according to Clancy's lawyer, Kevin Reddington. The facility suggested she seek care at a general mental health facility like McLean.
During a visit on December 6, 2022, Jollotta had discussed the possibility of Clancy having bipolar disorder with both Lindsay and Patrick Clancy. Jollotta noted Clancy's intense reactions to certain antidepressants, like Zoloft and Prozac, as potential indicators, a common side effect for individuals with bipolar disorder. Jollotta also considered Clancy's lack of sleep without fatigue as a potential symptom of a manic episode, suggesting she might be in a "mixed manic, hypomanic state." However, Jollotta testified that she never observed signs of psychosis in Clancy. Clancy's journal entries also revealed struggles with postpartum depression, anxiety, insomnia, and guilt related to caring for her infant son.