Kyle Sandilands has revealed he is experiencing depression and had thoughts of death amid the fallout of his friendship with longtime co-host Jackie 'O' Henderson. The radio veteran, 55, described his sadness as "unbearable" and "overwhelming," stating he felt he would "rather die... naturally" than continue experiencing such intense emotional pain.
Sandilands clarified that he has not been having suicidal thoughts, but that the severity of his sadness has been profound. He shared on his "Kyle Sandilands Live" show this week that the experience has given him a new understanding of emotional suffering. The normally outspoken host admitted that maintaining his usual on-air persona has become difficult, and he nearly broke down in tears after arriving at the studio one morning, sitting in darkness for an hour.
He described the feeling as being weighed down by a "heavy cloak" that he couldn't shake off. Sandilands expressed reluctance to seek professional help, citing past skepticism about psychologists, but emphasized that his current feelings were not indicative of dangerous self-harm ideation.
Despite the personal struggles, Sandilands also addressed his feelings towards Henderson. He stated that his concern for her well-being has not changed, and hearing about her situation only increases his worry. "What's going on? Is she alright? Has she got the right people around her? Is she safe? I don't know, it's terrible," he said.
Sandilands affirmed that his love for his former radio partner remains unconditional, even if they never speak again. "I will love her unconditionally, forever, even if I never speak to her again. But it is very, very hurtful," he stated. The radio host believes that time will ultimately aid in his recovery.
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