The holiday season, typically associated with joy and togetherness, can quickly become a source of stress due to extensive planning, spending, and family gatherings. Experts are advising individuals to begin organizing holiday preparations as early as September to mitigate potential strain and ensure a more enjoyable experience for everyone.
This early approach aims to address the significant amount of "invisible labor" involved in orchestrating holiday events, which disproportionately falls on women and caregivers. Licensed marriage and family therapist Jamila E. Holcomb noted that when one person coordinates flights, meals, gifts, childcare, and schedules, it creates substantial stress and an unequal division of labor. The pressure to create a "perfect" and memorable holiday, amplified by a hyper-connected culture, can transform planning into its own demanding task.
Financial Advantages of Early Planning
Beginning holiday planning in early fall can also lead to significant cost savings. With the ongoing increase in prices for goods like flights and groceries, booking travel and purchasing gifts in advance can help secure better rates and adhere to budgets. Travel expert Katy Nastro recommends booking domestic flights three to seven months ahead and international flights four to 10 months in advance, suggesting that locking in Thanksgiving travel by the end of September puts individuals in a more favorable position. Similarly, reserving rental cars early, potentially through platforms like AutoSlash, is advisable due to limited inventory.
For gift shopping, early fall is an opportune time, particularly for those on a tight budget or coordinating group gifts. Content creator Rachel Ann Thomas and her siblings begin brainstorming gift ideas for their parents in September or October. Holiday and event planner Lance Devereux advises starting the process early to track down sizes and place orders before the holiday rush, allowing for a slower pace of purchases and avoiding expensive express shipping fees.
Creating New Traditions and Sharing Responsibilities
The holidays often evoke nostalgia and reliance on established traditions. However, for families looking to evolve or introduce new customs, early planning is essential. Holcomb suggests engaging loved ones in conversations now about their ideal holiday experience, the traditions that hold the most meaning, and their current capacity. This also provides an opportunity to discuss incorporating new elements into the celebrations. Such discussions can help disrupt traditional relational patterns and roles.
To facilitate this, Holcomb and Thomas recommend creating shared tools like a calendar or spreadsheet to manage logistics and delegate tasks. Thomas's family uses an "itinerary" that outlines activities, visits, and even dinner menus for the entire Christmas period. Distributing responsibilities proactively, such as assigning someone to choose a movie outing or manage snacks, prevents one person from becoming overwhelmed.
Building in Downtime
Advance planning also allows for the intentional inclusion of rest and downtime, which are often craved during the busy holiday period. Emily Barry, senior vice president of holiday planning at Minted, emphasizes the importance of building breaks into the schedule before they become necessary. Barry advises protecting mornings or evenings from planned events and giving oneself permission to rest.
Instead of striving for a perfect schedule, the focus should be on creating meaningful moments. Barry suggests identifying one or two key events for family to gather and building the rest of the holiday around these anchors. This deliberate approach over several months allows for flexibility for family members traveling from afar, those with young children, or those managing multiple celebrations, while also enabling individuals to realistically assess their own capacity. The ultimate goal, as Barry notes, is to spend quality time together, not to execute a flawless itinerary.