Former ESPN host Samantha Ponder said on social media that the private messages she has received have become "more disturbing than ever" after she expressed sorrow over the death of conservative activist Charlie Kirk.
Ponder, who has posted on X about safety concerns in New York City's subway system following the stabbing death of Iryna Zarutska, wrote that responses to her public mourning of the 31-year-old Kirk have increasingly included attacks for expressing sympathy. "Apparently only perfect people can be mourned when they’re murdered in their 30s with a wife and young children," she wrote. "When a man is shot, debating opinions with anyone for all to see, he must align with our chosen dogma perfectly. If not, he had it coming/shouldn’t have said those mean things, so you should shut up about it."
Kirk, the founder of Turning Point USA and a prominent conservative commentator, was fatally shot at an event on the campus of Utah Valley University in Orem. Authorities have charged 20-year-old Tyler Robinson in the killing. The incident drew widespread attention and prompted expressions of grief and debate across political and media circles.
Ponder said the backlash to her expressions of grief has left her unsettled but determined. "I feel changed by this. At first, admittedly, more fearful," she wrote. "But as I consider what's at stake for our country and our children, I am emboldened to speak the truth with love even more. I spent so much of my professional career as a coward... shamefully afraid to say true things because it might jeopardize my position. One of the great things about having no ‘position’ anymore is the realization that a platform is actually useless without courage. I mourn for Charlie's family. I mourn for our country. But I have renewed hope that many, like me, will find the courage to lovingly speak the truth boldly in the public square, as he often did."
Ponder was among several sports and media figures who publicly reacted to Kirk's death. In her posts she lamented a pattern in which critics tell others not to publicly grieve figures whose views they oppose. "How can we see someone post about sadness over the death of ANYONE they cared about, even someone we think was flawed, and say 'Stop being sad about them. I didn’t like their opinions.' Mourn with those who mourn," she wrote.
The New York native has also publicly addressed other concerns since leaving ESPN, including a prior post on subway safety in the wake of Zarutska's killing and recent comments about her departure from the network. Ponder has said losing her former position removed constraints that had limited what she felt able to say publicly.
Authorities continue to investigate the circumstances surrounding Kirk's death and the events at the Utah Valley University function where the shooting occurred. Robinson has been charged in the case; his legal proceedings are pending.
Ponder's public statements and the responses they have drawn underscore the tensions that can arise when expressions of personal grief intersect with a highly polarized political landscape. She framed her own reaction as both personal mourning and a renewed willingness to speak publicly despite criticism.