In her latest column, Dear Abby offers guidance on a range of personal dilemmas, from romantic entanglements with relatives to fraught family relationships and breaches of etiquette.
A widower in his 60s from New Jersey seeks advice on his feelings for his first cousin, also in her 60s. He inquired about the legality of marrying a first cousin and whether it would be appropriate to ask her out. Abby confirmed that in New Jersey, marriage between first cousins is not prohibited by law, citing Justia.com. However, she cautioned the man to proceed with care, emphasizing the importance of ensuring his cousin reciprocates his romantic feelings to avoid alienating a valued family member.
The column also addressed a case of sibling estrangement and terminal illness. A reader from "In the Middle" wrote about her two brothers, Derek and Paul, who have not spoken in over six years due to poor communication. Derek, who has been diagnosed with terminal cancer, wishes to keep his condition secret from Paul, possibly due to past hurt feelings when Paul declined a family gathering. The reader asked for advice on how to encourage Derek to inform Paul.
Dear Abby advised the reader to directly ask Derek why he is keeping the news from Paul and to offer support in breaking the news if Derek chooses. Simultaneously, she suggested arranging a sibling get-together that accommodates Paul's schedule, noting that if he still refuses, deeper issues beyond poor communication might be at play.
Lastly, Abby responded to a reader bothered by a friend's inconsiderate behavior during a day trip. The friend trimmed her fingernails in the reader's car and placed her dirty shoes on the dashboard. Abby suggested a direct approach, recommending the reader state clearly and firmly, "Excuse me! I don’t want footprints on my dashboard or nail clippings in my car," and then ask the friend to clean up the messes.
Dear Abby is written by Jeanne Phillips, who has penned the column since 1985, following in the footsteps of her mother, Pauline Phillips, the original Abby, who founded the column in 1956.