Dating App Advice Sparks Backlash: Man Tells Women to Hide Accomplishments

A man's advice for women to conceal their accomplishments on dating apps to increase their chances of finding a partner has ignited a significant backlash online.

Shane Wilson shared his controversial dating tip on TikTok, suggesting that displaying career successes and signs of ambition on profiles can deter potential male suitors. In a video that has garnered over 35,900 views, Wilson stated, "Some of the pictures that you have on your dating app of your successes... about your accomplishments that show how driven you are, how dedicated you are, everything that you've accomplished for your career, we don't like those pictures."

He explained that such content can lead to "preconceived ideas" and make men feel "butthurt." Wilson concluded by urging women to "Take them down because you are missing out on guys that would swipe on you but won't give you a chance."

However, Wilson's advice was quickly met with sharp criticism from other users. Many argued that the purpose of highlighting accomplishments is precisely to filter out men who may feel threatened by successful women. "Why should we make ourselves small to attract men who inevitably won't respect us or who resent our accomplishments? We don't want those men," one commenter wrote. Another user suggested turning the advice into a series titled, "Tips on How to Weed Out Losers."

The debate also touched upon related research concerning dating app strategies. Scientists have suggested that listing multiple positive qualities, such as being "kind, outgoing, funny and dependable," might be counterproductive. Instead, researchers propose that telling a story about oneself can foster empathy and connection, thereby attracting more interest.

Gurit Birnbaum, a psychology professor at Reichman University in Israel, noted, "We are fascinated by stories, yet we write our dating profiles like shopping lists." She added that a narrative approach can help individuals be perceived as "a fellow human being" rather than a "mere commodity," which can be more effective in forming meaningful connections than simple lists of traits.