Collin Gosselin is taking control of his narrative with the release of his new memoir, "In the Shadow of Eight: Surviving the Reality of My Childhood," published on October 13. In the book, Gosselin, one of the sextuplets from "Jon & Kate Plus 8," delves into the challenging aspects of his upbringing that were not captured by the cameras, aiming to offer support to others who have faced similar difficulties.
"I always knew from when I was little that there was something about my childhood that wasn’t quite normal, and that maybe one day it’d be worthy to talk about those things," Gosselin, 22, told DECIDER. "And then as an adult, I realized it in fact was worthy to talk about, to write about."
He described the writing process as therapeutic, stating, "I just realized that with everything I’ve been through, so many others have also been through those exact same things, if not worse. And that even if I could help one person by sharing my experiences, then it would be all worth it."
In parallel with his memoir, Gosselin also returned to reality television on his own terms, participating in Season 5 of Fox's "Special Forces: World's Toughest Test." He joined a cast of celebrities facing demanding challenges orchestrated by directing staff members Mark “Billy” Billingham, Jason “Foxy” Fox, Rodolfo “Rudy” Reyes, and Jovon “Q” Quarles.
Gosselin viewed his participation in "Special Forces" as another avenue for personal growth and healing, akin to writing his memoir. He also expressed a hope that his estranged family members, particularly his siblings, might watch the show to see the person he has become. "I would like for them to see who I am nowadays, especially my siblings. They’ve only been told what a certain person wants them to hear about me for so long," he stated. "I think it’d be really cool for them to see who I am out in the jungle."
Reflecting on his experience on "Special Forces," Gosselin noted it as an "incredible journey of growth, healing, and just knowing that I can, in fact, push myself to be better and do difficult things." He also shared his feelings about being discharged from Marine Corps recruit training at Parris Island, admitting it was difficult but emphasized the importance of finding new things to look forward to and continuing to push forward.
Gosselin's memoir has already garnered support from viewers, something he deeply appreciates. "I always say, all the support that I’ve received from people, it’s like I have this one big online family and lots of internet moms, aunties, all that," he said. "I’m just so fortunate. I know for a fact that I have an army behind me, and that support brings me so far."
He also shared his father's encouraging reaction to his "Special Forces" participation, recalling, "He, in fact, was like, ‘You can do this.’ He was like, ‘You got this, Collin. Just go out and do your thing.’"
Gosselin highlighted that the challenges on "Special Forces" are as much mental as they are physical. "Honestly, people really think it’s always physical, but it really is mental," he explained. "It’s way more mental than physical. Boot camp, being on Special Forces, it’s mentality; it’s pushing forward."
The camaraderie among the recruits was a significant aspect of the experience. Gosselin noted, "We were all so connected. We’d sit and talk at the end of the day in our barracks, and it was like therapy. We really helped each other." He formed close bonds with several cast members, including Ruby Rose, Alexia Umansky, and Max Naumov.
Describing the living conditions, Gosselin mentioned, "even aside from all the crazy challenges we were doing, going back at the end of the day and living like that, with how the showers and the toilets and the sleeping situation [were], the way you’re living really pulls you together." He recounted an instance where all recruits woke up with a severe rash, further solidifying their shared experience.
When paired with Bre Tiesi for a height challenge, Gosselin offered support, drawing from his own past experiences of overcoming difficult situations. "I just wanted her to know that she could. She’s also a mother, and I told her this on the show: mothers are some of the strongest people on the planet," he said.
Despite being the youngest recruit, Gosselin found himself offering guidance to others due to his prior boot camp experience. "I knew all the gear and how to get around it. Or with the packs, or with anything. They did look to me and it was really cool," he recalled.
Regarding the departures of fellow recruits, Gosselin expressed sadness at Ruby Rose's self-elimination. "Out of the three that went home in Episode 2, undoubtedly Ruby. She’s so sweet, and I have so much empathy for her," he stated. "I was really sad to see her leave. I wanted to chat more."
Looking ahead, Gosselin affirmed his commitment to persevering, saying, "Even with everything I’ve been through in my life, I’m not a quitter. I will always push myself to do my best and find a learning opportunity in every challenge that I take on."