A British man who returned to his seaside hometown in Cornwall after two years living in Sydney, Australia, realized within a week that the United Kingdom no longer felt like home. Fraser, 25, had moved back to St Ives to be closer to his family, having become distressed by missing significant life events and wanting to reconnect with loved ones.
Despite anticipating a comfortable return, Fraser found himself longing for the opportunities and lifestyle he had experienced in Sydney, questioning his contentment with his previous life. "I realised the UK wasn't my home anymore after the first week," he told the Daily Mail. This experience is common for many young individuals who move between countries, seeking better opportunities abroad before family ties or other factors draw them back.
Fraser described his return as feeling like trying to fit into a life he had outgrown. "When you travel, explore, give yourself to the world, it shows you so much. It's life's greatest lesson - experience," he said. He felt that he had changed significantly, particularly during his time in Australia, and returning home felt like being a "big fish trying to squeeze back into this tiny fishbowl."
A Desire for More
Fraser’s initial decision to leave St Ives was fueled by a desire for broader life experiences, influenced by travel shows and films. Growing up in a tourist town presented seasonal employment challenges, leading him to feel “stuck and limited.” He also observed a pattern among locals, termed the "St Ives Cycle," where residents would work hard, party on weekends, and repeat the cycle, a stark contrast to the lifestyle he sought.
Sydney offered the change he craved, with its outdoor culture significantly altering his daily preferences. Upon returning to Britain, he found it difficult to ignore these changed desires. "Your friends back home feel a bit more distant than before - or at least for me - as we've changed so much in the time apart," he noted. He felt the opportunities, cultural exposure, and travel options were limited in his hometown.
The Morning Routine Revelation
Fraser's morning routine highlighted his difficulty readjusting. He found that early morning runs were met with deserted streets and a lack of open coffee shops until much later. "All open at 8 or 9am and the coffee being average or below adds to that too," he said. He had grown accustomed to the Australian mindset of maximizing the morning hours, engaging in activities like running, coffee with friends, and sea swims before work, which he termed a "5-to-9" before the "9-to-5." This routine made his day feel more fulfilling, a sense of "achieved greatness before 9am."
He believes Australians excel at appreciating everyday life, integrating health and well-being naturally into their routines, which contributes to their overall happiness. In contrast, he found a more complacent attitude in Britain, where people are "comfortable and just say, 'That's that then,' when it doesn't have to be."
Reasons for Returning
Despite his appreciation for the Australian lifestyle, Fraser's primary motivation for returning was his family. He was concerned about aging parents and a younger brother, feeling detached as he missed birthdays and Christmases. "My main reason for coming home was my family," he stated. He also missed certain aspects of British life, such as the friendliness of familiar people and traditional foods like fish and chips and English beer. However, the perceived safety of his hometown also began to feel restrictive, like an "isolated little pocket of the world."
Explaining his dissatisfaction to those who view St Ives as an ideal place to live has been challenging. "When you come home and you look at your old life you kind of go a bit like, 'Oh... is this it?'," he said. He feels his desire for more is met with suggestions to be more optimistic, rather than an understanding of his longing for experiences akin to his time abroad. He compared returning to settling for a "stale mattress single bed" after experiencing a "super comfortable king-size bed."
Fraser’s experience underscores the complex reality of returning home after living abroad. While the initial move overseas can create homesickness for people and traditions left behind, returning can foster a different kind of homesickness for the life and identity built abroad. For those who frequently move between countries, the concept of "home" can become more fluid than their nationality suggests.